IS YOUR WEBSITE
DEAD?
Enter a URL. Get the truth.
14
💀 Flatlined
33
🏥 Life Support
48
👻 Haunted
76
🕸️ Dusty
96
💚 Alive
Enter a URL. Get the truth.
Type any website address. No signups, no email required. Just a URL.
We probe SSL certificates, parse HTML structure, check every link, detect builder bloat, and analyze code quality across 4 categories.
Ghost Score from 0–100, a sarcastic Cause of Death, a plain-English recovery plan, and a shareable Death Certificate. Sites scoring 90+ earn a Certified Alive badge.
Copyright year, blog freshness, meta dates, sitemap recency. If your last update was during a previous administration, we'll find it.
Dead social profiles, broken navigation, 404'd outbound links. Every link is HEAD-checked with timeout handling.
SSL certificate, mobile viewport, structured data, semantic HTML, Open Graph tags, performance hints, meta descriptions.
Deprecated tech, builder bloat, font chaos, DOM depth, inline style abuse, script bloat, render-blocking resources, platform detection.
$ Stateless architecture. 27 checks across 4 parallel serverless functions. TLS certificate probing, HTML parsing via Cheerio, Satori image generation. Builder platform detection for WordPress, Wix, Squarespace, GoDaddy, Weebly, and Shopify. Upstash Redis rate limiting. Costs $0/month to run.
27 checks across 4 categories. We analyze timestamps (copyright year, blog freshness, sitemap dates), links (social media, navigation, outbound), security and quality (SSL, structured data, semantic HTML, Open Graph, performance hints), and cobweb indicators (deprecated code, builder bloat, font chaos, DOM depth, script bloat, inline styles, platform detection).
Yes. Full results, Ghost Score, recovery plan, shareable Death Certificate, and Certified Alive badge (for 90+ scores) — no signup, no paywall.
No. We only read your public HTML, probe your SSL certificate, and check a few links. No login, no JavaScript execution, no changes to your site.
Template builders give you the basics (SSL, viewport, favicon) but produce bloated markup, excessive DOM nesting, inline style abuse, and lack developer-level optimizations like structured data, semantic HTML, and performance hints. We check for the things that separate a template from a professionally built site.
Your results include a plain-English recovery plan with prioritized fixes. If you want professional help, the “Request Emergency Resuscitation” button connects you directly with us — pre-filled with your scan results.